The practice of lovingkindness can fundamentally alter our attitudes and understandings about our relationship with the world.

The practice of lovingkindness can fundamentally alter our attitudes and understandings about our relationship with the world. Here’s an example: have you ever had the experience of having an argument with someone, but entirely in the privacy of your own head? I’m sure you’re familiar with that experience.

But have you ever wondered who it is that you’re arguing with? Most of us never get that far in our analysis of ourselves, but let’s do it now. It’s obviously not the actual other person that you’re arguing with, since they’re probably not present, and even if they are then it’s not the external version of them that you’re having the argument with.

If you think about it, you can only reach the conclusion that it’s yourself that you are arguing with. One part of your mind (which you identify as yourself) and another part of your mind (which manifests as an internal representation of your enemy) are locked in a fight. The “real” enemy isn’t involved at all. (It’s interesting to ask who, if anyone, wins these arguments, but I’ll leave you to figure that out for yourselves).